15 Lamest Superheroes Of All Time

14. Dogwelder

The clue is in the name, believe it or not: Dogwelder's superpower was to weld dead dogs to the faces of bad guys. Set in the DC Universe, Dogwelder was part of Section 8 alongside other mighty heroes such as Sixpack (an alcoholic) and Defenestrator (who carried around the window he threw criminals through). Dogwelder was a pretty weird guy, a gaunt man who never, ever spoke. He didn't just use dead dogs he found lying around, which would have been a relatively useful solution to a minor problem facing Gotham. No, Dogwelder actively set traps around the city's alleyways to catch unsuspecting pooches, and then use their bodies to administer his own unique brand of justice. Quite how effective this approach to crimefighting would be is anyone's guess. It would be pretty easy just to hack off the body and wait for the welded part to rot away, leaving any the bad guy fully capable of committing crime - albeit with a horrifically scarred face. But even if they couldn't face the world due to the embarrassment of having a rotting dog corpse on their face, it would probably just promote an interest in cyber-crime. If someone wants to break the law, they'll do it whether they have a dead dog stuck to their face or not.
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Simon Spowart hasn't written a bio just yet, but if they had... it would appear here.