10 Dumb Movie Sequels That Had Nothing To Do With The Originals

9. Speed 2: Cruise Control (1997)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3279Ry6bN4k It's A Sequel To... Speed (1994) I guess in the sense that it's about a "vehicle that might explode" there's a loose link between Speed and its sequel, Speed 2: Cruise Control, but there's such a thin layer of comparison to be had here that these movies don't deserve to be tied together. Fact is, Speed 2 is about a cruise ship programmed to crash into an oil tanker. A cruise ship. Is "speed" the first thing that comes to mind when you think of a cruise ship? Probably not. Keanu Reeves didn't sign on for this one, presumably because he has a brain somewhere in that head of his, but Sanda Bullock decided to reprise her role, 'cause Sandra Bullock. So she's in this, which I suppose justified the fact that they could bill it as a continuation of the original. Somebody called Jason Patric fills in for Keanu Reeves this time around, which - despite sounding like it - is not a good thing at all. Mostly bizarrely, though, the idea for Speed 2 apparently came to director Jan de Bont (that's a real name, I swear) in a series of reoccurring dreams he had about a ship crashing into an island. Almost as if he was destined to make this picture, huh? I've had dreams about things crashing into things, where's my $110 million to make a movie out of it?
 
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All-round pop culture obsessive.