4. Sean Connery - The Hunt For Red October (1990)
*Not actually an attempt at America - but too awful to not include regardless. Sir Sean Connery is acting royalty, most famous for playing suave secret agent James Bond, with a licence to kill and a Scottish accent. Here in The Hunt For Red October, Connery plays a Soviet submarine captain. He's a hard-nosed and stern Russian guiding a sub brimming with nuclear weapons - oh, and he has a Scottish accent. Basically then, no matter the role, it's inevitable and unavoidable that Connery's Scottish-ness will stream out of him like verbal diarrhoea. His linguistic turns are half-baked and his accent cannot be masked or tamed. From Irish to Russian, Arabic to Spanish, Connery has no time for anywhere that doesn't serve haggis. It's debatable whether or not he's ever attempting another accent to be honest. But forget the hunt for Red October - Connery needs to plan a quick and thorough search for a decent Russian accent before his crew start to become
sshushpisshush.