CONAN THE BARBARIAN Trailer Should Be Tied To The Tree Of Woe

Well the first teaser released a couple of months back had more dry ice in it than an 80s pop video - so this is our first good look at the Lionsgate's new film version of Conan the Barbarian from director Marcus Nispel of the Texas Chainsaw remake, a supposed faithful return to Robert E. Howard's source material. The movie stars tv regular Jason Momoa (Stargate Atlantis), Stephen Lang (Avatar), Rose McGowan (Planet Terror) and of course, Ron Perlman (Hellboy) is in it too. It looks every bit as lunk-headed as you probably thought it would. Sporting a look somewhere between TVs Hercules and Xena and the now tiresome sword and sorcery cliches (leather underpants, sexy witches etc) are present. Take a peek. When asked the riddle of steel, Arnie's Conan answered;
To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of their women.
By the looks of this trailer, all I can hear is the lamentation. Conan the Barbarian is released in enemy crushing 3D on August 19th.
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Neil Upton hasn't written a bio just yet, but if they had... it would appear here.