Mortal Engines Review: 3 Ups & 7 Downs

2018's most handsome dumpster fire.

Mortal Engines

The Peter Jackson-produced adaptation of Philip Reeve's hit 2001 novel Mortal Engines hit UK cinemas this weekend ahead of its upcoming international release, and as just about everybody expected, it's...not good. Not good at all.

Critics have generally been mixed-negative in their assessment of the young adult blockbuster so far, which despite Jackson's enthusiastic involvement and some spectacular visuals, is fundamentally undone by its soulless, committee-assembled script (co-written by Jackson himself).

Was there a good movie in here somewhere? Almost certainly, but without a voice capable of avoiding the pitfalls of the genre, we're left with a gorgeous yet dull husk of a film that can't even begin to live up to its potential.

As if it wasn't already obvious before the reviews started coming in, this thing's dead-on-arrival as far as box office prospects go, so there's basically zero chance of it getting a sequel.

Cut your losses and don't even bother, but if you absolutely must see Mortal Engines, it's probably at least worth watching it on the biggest screen you can find...


Stay at home dad who spends as much time teaching his kids the merits of Martin Scorsese as possible (against the missus' wishes). General video game, TV and film nut. Occasional sports fan. Full time loon.