The Wolverine: 15 Stupid Things To Avoid Doing In Real Life

Heart We can all agree that The Wolverine was a vast improvement on its predecessor, X-Men Origins: Wolverine. While the ending followed the usual comic-book-movie cluster of too much CGI, a contrived twist that was telegraphed an hour before the movie was released, and action that went on for way too long, the rest of the film felt like a more focused and intimate experience. Even if the story was a tad on the dull side. Wolverine wasn€™t required to save the world, but was instead tasked with dealing with his own inner demons. The more personal story was the perfect counter balance to the action. Like Dredd, The Wolverine proved that smaller stories carry more punch than watching New York be destroyed for the 150th time. But for all its good points, there were many things that kept dragging me out of the experience. Things that didn€™t make sense or just seemed really, really stupid. Not enough to break the film like they break The Dark Knight Rises, but enough to have me still thinking about them once the end credits started rolling. To celebrate The Wolverine being released on Blu-ray this week, here are 15 stupid things which occurred in the movie that you should really avoid doing in real life...

15. Don't Body Splash Doors

Door There are many ways you can break down a door. Kicking it, shooting the lock and barging it with your shoulder are the preferred methods. The police even have an efficient battering ram that they use to smash a door down. But I€™ve never known anyone try to smash a door down with his or her belly. After being chased by a lone Yakuza scumbag, Wolverine and Mariko run into an Internet cafe to escape. He follows them in and spots them run into a back office and close the door. Instead of adopting one of the more traditional methods when it comes to opening a door by force, Yakuza guy decides to run at the door and perform a running body splash to break down the door. Obviously it doesn€™t work but unfortunately, it also gives Wolverine the chance to stab him with his claws right through the door. Moral of the story: don€™t try body-splashing doors because you won€™t win. Another thing to notice in this scene is how unconcerned the people in the Internet cafe are. Even though bullets are flying around them, it's not enough for them to stop liking stuff on Facebook. They just sit there like it's an everyday occurrence.
Contributor
Contributor

Child of the 80's. Brought up on Star Trek, Video Games and Schwarzenegger, my tastes evolved to encompass all things geeky.