Newcastle Transfers: 10 Perfect Signings Carver Won't Make Today

Remember when Newcastle used to sign people on transfer deadline day? Nope, nobody does.

Predicting what Newcastle will do in any transfer window is an entirely pointless endeavour. Despite the fact that the club patently need a new centre-back, as well as reinforcements up front, the board have flashed their usual vague smile and said they couldn't possibly make any signings in the short-term when they could make them in the long-term. Quite how a policy that seems intent on only ever signing anyone in the next window will manage to actually deliver any signings remains to be seen, but since the manager isn't actually allowed to talk about signings and the board only do once a year when the season ticket renewal date comes round, it's hard to say what will happen. What won't happen though is a much easier question. For instance, if Moussa Sissoko is sold, Newcastle WON'T replace him - there simply won't be the time, and besides. Mehdi Abeid is back and that will be like having a new signing anyway... And there won't be a new striker because Papiss Cisse is back from the ACN and his robocop-like knee is definitely not going to explode at any moment. And who needs defenders anyway? So with that in mind, here's a frustrating look at the players Newcastle should be looking at signing immediately, who definitely won't be coming before the deadline passes.
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