Friends: 25 Lessons That Completely Changed Your Life
24. You Should Never Count Mississippily
You now know that no matter how strong the urge, when it comes to counting down something as important as a spray tan, always count Mississippilessly. As a general rule of thumb for a happy life, it's best to pay attention to EXACTLY how long things are advised to take, especially if you could end up looking like an idiot...
23. How NOT To Massage
Despite having the highest IQ of the group, Ross never had what could be termed Life Smarts, and it was usually he who played the part of the Friends fool, from his accidentally making himself an 8, to his comical inability to stay married. He too offered us all the blue-print for exactly how not to massage an old man: don't use wooden spoons, and definitely don't use Tonka trucks, even if the "client" claims they like it.
22. Always Thoroughly Check All Potential Room-Mates Out
Models and fashion photographers are good, out of work actors who will sponge off you and people who helped you pick out a sausage at the supermarket aren't necessarily the best people to choose to live with you. Sure the former might entertain you and become your best friend, but the latter will probably turn out to be a psychotic who invents trips to Las Vegas, accuses you of sleeping with his girlfriend and killing his fish, and ultimately refuses to move out.