10 Plot Holes On Every Episode Of WWE RAW

As the sort of hardcore wrestling fan who writes or reads about it, we're often more concerned with the inner machinations of WWE than the often dismal onscreen product it presents because WWE television shows are impossible to believe in.

Though this weirdly manifests as a systemic disregard/hatred of it, WWE has its fiercely loyal, static, core audience to thank for its continued presence on television. No TV station in its right f*cking mind would accept this incomprehensible drivel without it. WWE is an established, bulletproof property stretching back decades - guaranteed money, effectively. For that reason alone, WWE is set to pocket billions from FOX and USA over the next five years.

"But WWE is meant to be entertainment!"

Yes, but entertainment is meant to make sense. WWE isn't presenting surrealistic interpretive art. It (ostensibly) presents straightforward conflicts between good and evil and, accordingly, we must believe in the power of the good to overcome and deliver moments of triumph and catharsis and resolution and all those things that drive the very escapist essence of mainstream popular culture. We can't believe in the power of the good. The good guys don't even know if they're good, and they aren't grappling some internal conflict; they are grappling the same opponents every bloody week.

To prove that this is a regular occurrence, let's pay particular attention to this week's hopeless episode...

This week, it was Seth Rollins. Last week, it was Finn Bálor. It was the turn of Roman Reigns the week before that. As for the week before that, who cares? They've probably lost every match they have competed in since.

A wrestler - anyone will do, they're all the same - invariably interrupts the opening verbal segment to dispute whatever is being said, invariably using overwritten verbiage comprised of infantile word play that never, ever emanates from a real-life mouth. Copy and paste blocking, copy and paste writing, interchangeable characters. We overuse the word invariably purposefully here because every f*cking week it is the godd*mn same sh*t. This is not so much a plot hole but a big bang creating countless alternate realities. We're clearly meant to infer that Rollins et al. act of their own volition - so what's stopping the likes of Heath Slater from acting of their own volition, interrupting the opening segment and reaping the rewards of a high-profile match that come with it?

A plot hole is a narrative inconsistency that leads one to questions its integrity and, in turn, the integrity of the characters. Due to the proximity of the protagonist and antagonist in Gorilla, we cannot accept the fact that they are in dispute in wrestling's live context. It stretches the necessity of the pro wrestling angle to breaking point. The opening segment is a deeply suspicious device with which to set the up the night's events. Probably best to use the singular there.

There is just one event, and it is...