10 Things WWE Superstars Need This Christmas

7. Braun Strowman - Premium Life Insurance

Xanta Klaus
WWE

Poor Braun hasn't half been in the wars this year. The last twelve month's saw Roman Reigns shatter his elbow, followed up with a get-well card in the form of attempted vehicular homicide, all before the 'Monster Among Men' was hoyed in a garbage truck and apparently crushed to death. Arse-kickings of such magnitude really do make this Strowman's annus horribilis.

But WWE's resident Kenny has popped straight back up after each and every setback. Death isn't the handicap it was in the olden days, apparently, and the brutish Behemoth could make a virtue of it if he was a little more savvy. With so many resurrections, Strowman could make a killing on his frequent killings with a top-rate life insurance policy.

Sure, you usually need a death certificate - but no-one would believe someone could walk out of that ambulance crash alive - and be fine the next day.

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Editorial Team
Editorial Team

Benjamin was born in 1987, and is still not dead. He variously enjoys classical music, old-school adventure games (they're not dead), and walks on the beach (albeit short - asthma, you know). He's currently trying to compile a comprehensive history of video game music, yet denies accusations that he purposefully targets niche audiences. He's often wrong about these things.