5 Most Insane Things Happening In Wrestling Right Now (Jan 25)
The SHAVE Community?!
Vince McMahon just doesn't "get" tag team wrestling because he doesn't have the inclination to get it.
As revealed by Bruce Prichard, he deems it an affront to capitalism, and in the incendiary words of Daniel Bryan, would prefer to "hoard the wealth" than spread it amongst four performers. Singles main events are cheaper, and so singles main events it is! Cut back on pyro, too. Underpay all talent for decades and decades. There's nowhere else for 'em to work, pal! Name my new luxury yacht 'Sexy Bitch'. Day done. Time now for an hour or two of sleep, leading to several rash, impulse decisions made tomorrow at the expense of several ongoing storylines.
Vince has for some time now - essentially, beyond the odd rare high, ever since a lack of competition allowed him to get away with it - treated tag team wrestling as a joke. Strange bedfellows pairings; Lucha House Rules; small children; once-popular tandems Vince just sort of forgets about...
...he likes the New Day, because they make him the vast vats of cash he doesn't even stop working to spend. But that's about it.
It's little wonder, then, that the reported "We can change" plea manifested as a terrible old time for the Revival.
5. When Is A Push Not A Push?
Right, so this is borderline magic in its wrongness.
The story goes that last week, The Revival, still in their gear, requested their release. Pissed off to high heaven at working unflattering matches with the Lucha House Party, over and again, as if the first wasn't a bizarre embarrassment, officials pleaded with Dash Wilder and Scott Dawson to give them three months - three months to fundamentally alter Vince McMahon's approach to tag team wrestling which, even if successful, would last about three weeks.
The Revival actually revived southern-style tag team wrestling by perfecting the art of artifice in NXT; devising incredible new ways of pulling the wool over the eyes of referees framed as halfway competent, the act added so much heat and creativity and drama to their constant stream of classics. It was a great time. But hey, f*ck the Revival, pal, there's two of 'em.
On Monday's RAW, the Revival were rubbish at cheating. Curt Hawkins (!), selected as special guest referee, became the greatest referee of all time overnight. This novice was better at officiating than the Revival were at their entire act. Reforming the Major Brothers isn't the worst idea of all time, but imagine trying to use Zack Ryder as proof that WWE is going to do something of note with the Revival going forward. Evidence to the contrary is staring them in the face. They might as well have had the ghost of JTG send them an ominous warning.
This was meant to convince them that things were going to get better!