In July, WWE hit rock bottom. The Raw rating was in, and it was the lowest of all time.
Though idiomatically illogical, they hit it again in September. And again in October. And once more, two weeks ago. The company has had so many rock bottoms this year you'd think a certain Dwayne Johnson was back in the fold.
Lord, how they wish that was true.
At this point, even Dante couldn't come up with a name for the level of hell Raw's ratings are in. So in a time of acute desperation, the company have turned to their most desperate measure: Vince McMahon.
The chairman, personally excised from television on account of his advancing age, only ever sets foot on screens for something truly monumental. Such as grasping one last opportunity to give Shane "a f**king beating", or, in more jovial spirits, dancing alongside that same son as part of SmackDown 1000's celebrations.
So it's noteworthy that WWE have announced, in direct response to cataclysmic numbers, that Vince is set to alight on Raw next week to "shake things up". Just what might that involve? For one, it's probably going to be a family affair...
Benjamin was born in 1987, and is still not dead. He variously enjoys classical music, old-school adventure games (they're not dead), and walks on the beach (albeit short - asthma, you know).
He's currently trying to compile a comprehensive history of video game music, yet denies accusations that he purposefully targets niche audiences. He's often wrong about these things.