7 Most Insane Historical Attempts To Create A Super Soldier

As it turns out, history is full of battle units straight out of a cocaine-fueled cartoon.

Because the people you hate rarely have the common gosh-darn decency to just die and give you all their stuff on their own, mankind had to go and invent war. But we didn’t exactly hit it out of the park on the first swing. Before we finally discovered that making the perfect soldier involved lying to them at the recruiter’s office and then angrily yelling at them for a few years, humanity has spent a lot of time tinkering with its warrior formula.

Over the centuries, the main theme of these experiments seemed to be the firm belief that when it comes to maxing out soldiers’ effectiveness in combat, there’s no such thing as a stupid idea.

This has resulted in history being full of real/legendary battle units straight out of cocaine-fueled cartoons starring soldiers powered by the most improbable things imaginable, including…