7 Wrestling Characters I Read Way Too Much Into
Sometimes, a wrestling clown is just a wrestling clown.
2016 is a strange time to be alive. The recent EU Referendum
in the United Kingdom is a great example of this, a referendum where people had
a plethora of information available to them but mostly seemed to vote on
assumption, gut feeling, and whatever conclusions they drew from personal
analysis. This is the crux of the world we live in, a world that is a strange
mix of skepticism and passion.
Professional wrestling is a microcosm of the world at large, or at least it is meant to be. The way we perceive it has changed, from taking what was put in front of us as gospel, all the way to the modern world of ‘he is losing to him because of this’. Sometimes we forget that it is entertainment.
As a 30 year old wrestling fan in 2016, I have been guilty on countless occasions of reading far too deeply into characters and their motivations, of attributing motives that span multiple years as opposed to just accepting that, I don’t know, Kane didn’t like that Jericho spilled his coffee all over him. Sometimes, a spade is just a spade.
This isn’t going to stop me over-analysing though, far from it. Here are seven wrestlers that I read way too much into, when the reality was a whole lot simpler
7. Fandango
Ever since he arrived on the main roster ahead of WrestleMania 29, something has seemed slightly off when it comes to Fandango. He was initially reluctant to compete unless his name was pronounced correctly, something he was extremely sensitive about. Eventually he stepped into the ring, but despite his obvious athleticism, Fandango was more interested in dancing than fighting.
Fandango's issues go way back, to his earliest days on NXT. Then known as Johnny Curtis, Fandango had spent four years in developmental before finally getting a chance on the show. His pro was R-Truth, and despite the obvious handicap of having Mr. Killings as his pro Curtis went on to win the show.
Unfortunately, that wasn't enough for Truth. The win guaranteed Curtis a tag team title shot, but by the time Johnny was ready to use it Truth had turned heel. Curtis was abandoned. He tried to get over it through his love of puns, but this just led to him being ostracised further. Set aside from society, Curtis headed back to NXT to find a world of misfits, far away from the public eye.
Free of attention, Curtis did what most organisms do when abandoned and started to go a little weird. For a long time he'd been vanilla, and this meant his weirdness was worryingly accentuated. He stopped wearing shirts, and took to carrying chloroform with him. Nobody wanted anything to do with Dirty Curty. He had one friend left: the equally confused Michael McGillicutty.
Abandoned by the world, Curtis began to display the classic symptoms of neglectful insanity. He began to mimic the one who had abandoned him first, and took to dancing at every opportunity he could get. Curtis couldn't control it though, and his need to reconcile with his first pain led to him losing all focus. Truth had never loved him, so Curtis found solace in the only thing Truth had truly taught him; the power of dance.
Either that or he's a guy that likes dancing, I don't know.