8 Match Star Ratings For WWE TLC 2019
Tiresome, Long and Charitably very good for a short while...
The unpopular, late announcement of the line-up was probably overstated.
It's not as if this was a lazy mystery vortex show; WWE had built several storylines, in the foreground, but Vince McMahon made the decision not to announce them as part of a new strategy to drive Network subscriptions. WWE made the matches, just not the graphics.
That's not to excuse the build, mind. What was compelling about Aleister Black Vs. Buddy Murphy? Was it can't-miss because Aleister Black almost missed his opportunity? Seriously, what the f*ck: Murphy knocked on Black's door to pick a fight-uh, Black didn't hear-uh, and he was pissed-uh, at himself, presumably, because Murphy told the guy who was once unflappable to "calm down".
It was weird, and that accounted for that initial lack of big match atmosphere. Black and Murphy engineered it on the night, but Jesus, think of how much more effective all this would be, if the booking and the storytelling matched the talent. The same old pattern emerged on Sunday night, and it is very, very f*cking simple: the wrestlers are as talented as the writers are not.
The writers shape the wrestlers.
Rinse, repeat, die inside...
8. KICKOFF: Andrade Vs. Humberto Carillo
God, Andrade is great.
Even when working at that trademark crawl of an early pace, he distinguished himself from everybody else that is forced to by registering what he did do brilliantly: the sly, sh*t-eating gran that crept over his face after sending Humberto Carillo to the rafters with a back body-drop was perfectly smug, and suddenly, the crowd cared for the plight of a babyface they previously hadn't been given reason to.
His subsequent heat spot, catalysed by a massive, reckless bump on Carillo's part, was snug enough to sustain interest, though it did veer into Every Modern WWE Match You've Ever Seen territory the longer it went on, which a second picture-in-picture break in about four minutes didn't help.
After labouring through that, Andrade lit up Carillo's chest with chops, to which Carillo responded with a superb, very dialled-in version of a comeback he stumbled through somewhat on last week's RAW. Andrade, as the back-and-forth heated up, sent Carillo crashing into the turnbuckle with a crucifix after evading a standing moonsault, in a lovely bit of work, before Carillo responded with a perfect corkscrew plancha. Andrade didn't have to catch him, even those he's one of the few in WWE who actually can: Carillo timed it so well that he protected his opponent with supernatural agility and control. A long and revealing foot stomp set-up broke the spell, but Andrade did well not to break Humberto's ribs, so it could be forgiven.
Andrade is f*cking great, because he worked that nasty shoot eye injury into the finish by taking so long to wipe it that Humberto struck with a sick inverted 'rana and a sumptuous moonsault for the win.
The best match on the show happened before the show started.
One of WWE's shorter PPVs of 2019 was a long night.
Star Rating: ★★★¾