Did you honestly think Joss Whedon was going to be able to put this together as flawlessly as the first time? Actually yes, many people did - there's a reason the phrase "In Whedon We Trust" is plastered all over memes and forum account headers; the guy did the impossible in 2012, spinning a number of superhero logo'd plates and barely stopping for breath until the whole thing was wrapped up in a neat little package. Along the way he also perfected what many directors had completely fumbled in nailing; the lighter more comedic aspects of the script. They were never too invasive, fit the characters they came from and always gave you the right amount of breathing room when you needed it most. Not anymore. Age of Ultron is a belaboured mess of a movie, not put together through any semblance of artistic integrity of necessity, instead being more in the realm of just having your favourite characters thwack the lycra off each other for a couple of hours and nothing more. Make no mistake, there is zero plot advancement here for the overall mythos - and some of the character beats even set people back one or two movies' worth of development in the process. In short, you'll want to like this at every opportunity, but for each one thing it gets right there's another three waiting to kick your adoration back down and remind you that "Hey, if you consider yourself a Marvel or comic book fan, this movie actually isn't for you." Why? Well, let's get started, because it ain't pretty.