Having a baby is the most beautiful thing in the world. Well it is, if your idea of beautiful is a room full of people staring intently at your cavernous, bleeding vagina. Apologies in advance for the gaudy nature of this article, but there shall be no mollycoddling around the facts - pregnancy is grim. Spawning an overlord (we mean, baby) varies from woman to woman, of course, but the general consensus among those who've experienced housing another human being inside them for 40 weeks, is that it's pretty gross. Alas, ladies aren't delicate flowers; we're kick ass human-baking machines, and we're not afraid of leaking the most "TMI" horrors pregnancy entails. After all, once you've done a poo in front of your husband and doctor, embarrassment is just a word. Before you start freaking out and banning yourself from sex for life, remember not everyone will experience all of these. Just don't go fooling yourself that it's like the movies - cravings and morning sickness are the least of your worries.
13. It's Not Just Your Boobs That Swell
Hurray! Your two mamas are more voluptuous than they've ever been, but there's a downside to the inflation. Your hands swell, none of your shoes will fit.. and, yes, even down there swells. No one warned us about that minor detail, did they? As the progesterone your body produces engorges your genital area with fluids, and your growing baby traps the blood supply in your labia; you, terrifyingly, end up looking like you've just stuffed a burger down your knickers. And it hurts.