13 Terrible Recent Movies Destined To Become Cult Classics
12. Fifty Shades Freed
What more even needs to be said about the Fifty Shades franchise, really? True devotees to the cause would put themselves through all three of these wretched "romantic" movies, but if you're going to pick one, you may as well settle on the most sublimely garish and off-the-rails of the lot.
The third and purportedly final Fifty Shades movie brings Christian (a comatose Jamie Dornan) and Anastasia's (Dakota Johnson) "epic" love story to an hilariously un-sexy, ahem, climax, as the pair partake in a series of risibly tame sex scenes involving ice cream and My First BDSM Kit, before it becomes a straight-up 90s D-list thriller in act three.
That's right. What a franchise supposed to give sexless, middle-aged women their jollies needed was guns, kidnappings and near-murder. While it might not service its target demo well, it certainly cuts the mustard for those who love a catastrophic cinematic misfire.
If you're not crying with laughter by the time the "touching" final franchise montage plays things out, you just might be depressed.