20 Alternative 2017 Movie Awards

11. Laziest Cash-Grab - The Emoji Movie

Kids are always on their phones, right? How do we get their money without getting sh*t from parents about microtransactions and pay-to-play games? We'll make a movie about phones!

And thus, in a boardroom somewhere in Hollywood, The Emoji Movie was born. Probably.

A sickeningly cynical piece of mass-market 'entertainment', The Emoji Movie is nothing but 86 minutes of product placement laced with terrible jokes and a weak message about being yourself. And it features living legend Sir Patrick Stewart as the voice of a turd, so there's also that.

Unbelievably, the movie still managed to earn $217m at the box office. If that gets a Bitmoji movie green-lit, then creativity is officially dead.