...And finds a small snail on his front step. The man takes the snail and throws it across the road. A year later, the same man opens the same door to find the same snail on the same step. The snail looks up at him and hollers, "What the f**k was that all about!?"
14. I Bought A Ceiling Fan The Other Day
What a complete waste of money. All he ever does is applaud and yell, "I love how smooth it is!"
13. My Deaf Wife Left Me For Our Deaf Friend.
It's my fault really, I should have seen the signs.