5. You Tend To Fail At Father/Son Bonding Attempts
Homer Simpson tends to have this problem as well, but before we yell out "Simpsons Did It!" lets be clear: Peter Griffin doesn't just fail at father/son bonding attempts, he tends to go down in flames at them. Taking your son to Vegas for a quickie bar mitzvah? That's a sure-fire way to get your wife, and the entire Jewish community pissed off at you. Taking your son hunting for some messed up reason like realizing his penis is bigger than yours? We don't even know what that is, and you probably need serious therapy. And then there's getting into bed with him thinking he's your wife... In any case, if this is you - stop trying to bond with your kid and see a family therapist, pronto!