10 Insane Wrestling Gimmicks That Morphed Into Another Level
10. The New Daniel Bryan
WWE isn't just a Republican-leaning organisation; by monopolising the pro wrestling racket and tearing apart the bodies of the workforce in its insatiable, abrasive maw, Vince McMahon is effectively the bile-spewing symbol of capitalism. The men and women under his watch have taken full-on chair shots to the skull and leaps of faith from lunatic heights, and the horrible bastard doesn't even provide them health insurance. And now, his flagship WWE Champion is an environmentalist socialist feminist vegan and his name, somehow, some way, is not Oar Bittar.
His name is The New Daniel Bryan.
The premise behind the persona is improbable enough, but Bryan has escalated it with the stupendous visual of his custom hemp WWE Title and a staunch refusal to wear unethical official merchandise. The man looks like a scraggy, ranting conspiracy theorist, and he wrestles, sometimes to the detriment of crowd heat, technical clinics that require deep thinking to extract the maximum appreciation from. Daniel Bryan performs for WWE, the broadest wrestling product out, and he aims his entire shtick at the dweller who thinks Akira Taue was better than Mitsuharu Misawa.
He is the pro wrestler for the soy boy beta wannabe hipster cuck, and I love him.
To emphasise the insanity of it all, Bryan is now flanked by...