10 Wrestling Promos WWE Regret

The Pipebomb wasn't a pipebomb.

By Michael Sidgwick /

WWE is incapable of regret, you understand.

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It is a company capable of introspection in 2020 - the John Cena babyface myth was destroyed within weeks of Triple H acknowledging that he has heard crickets more often than not in his big matches - but a regret that informs systemic change, not so much.

They don't regret anything. But they should.

Trace the decline in popularity from 2001 to now, and an interesting and damning correlation surfaces: the twilight hours of the Attitude Era transitioned into the woeful diminished viewership of Ruthless Aggression and beyond via a shift from collaborative expression to the heavily-scripted creative model ushered in by new Head of Creative Stephanie McMahon. The change from booking to writing, incited by a toxic and counterproductive we-know-best arrogance, haemorrhaged viewers.

Far be it from me to say that Road Dogg has not a f*cking clue about really matters, but he recently reinforced this wildly damaging company line: a talent must be trusted to cut a promo before they are given license to get over in the time-honoured tradition that spanned the entirety of when it was big time.

WWE Creative 3:16 says water moccasins, feet, and magic beans. It is not good.

But it is the way.

10. Triple H Tells The World That The Roster Sucks Sh*t

"Who else are you gonna wrestle at 'Mania, Dead Man?

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CM Punk is a skinny fat ass who doesn't know how to work. Sheamus did nothing with the rub I gave him last year. Drew McIntyre needs a few years in WCP-NXT to realise his potential. And I'm pretty sure that Tyler Reks guy got lost on his way to TNA. Face it, 'Taker: I'm the best we have, and you should have worked it out by now. You see, I've spent the last nine years saying this over and over again, for 20 minutes at a time!"

That's not what Triple H said, exactly, on the February 28, 2011 RAW, but that was sure as sh*t the subtext.

Triple H in formalising his challenge of the Undertaker's WrestleMania streak literally said that there were no "challenges left" worthy of the occasion, explicitly referencing the rank-and-file "in the back" to support his point. This was nonsensical in kayfabe - Triple H had already lost to 'Taker at 'Mania a decade prior - and counterproductive in reality.

Triple H swung his king d*ck like a guillotine - in what your writer isn't so sure wasn't the first big play for John Laurinaitis' job - inviting the entire audience to perceive the full-time roster as hapless nonentities.

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