14 Times Really Weird Sh*t Went Down At WrestleMania 32

14. Woo Woo Woo - No One Knows It

I’ve already written about the weirdness in Zack Ryder even being included in the Intercontinental Championship ladder match in the first place.

After all, this is a man who’s been buried so deep that he can use toxic waste as a duvet. He’s been right at the bottom of the undercard for four years: his recent showings as the boring part of a nothing tag team on NXT has been the most noteworthy thing he’s done since 2012 that isn’t blonde or Australian.

And now, not only was he a featured part of the match for the Intercontinental Championship at WrestleMania, but he’s booked to win the damn thing. People were already worried that he got the match because he’s not well: now they’re convinced the man must be terminal, because this is Make A Wish territory, right here.

In a way, it makes a little sense: we now know why the company’s secondary title was being contested in a multi-man ladder match for the second year in a row. After all, no one’s going to buy Zack Ryder winning a singles match.

But I do wonder about those poor fans that may have only begun watching the product in the last three years or so - young people, or lapsed fans lured back in by the bargain price of the WWE Network - who have no idea who this ‘Ryder’ is, and who remain convinced that he’s a new signee getting a monster push on his debut.

“Is that the man from New Japan Pro Wrestling, daddy?”

“No, son. It’s the decayed corpse of a man who reached for Vince McMahon’s brass ring in 2011, only to find out that it was a doughnut.”