5 Most Insane Things Happening In Wrestling Right Now (August 10)

5. John Cena To Debut Sixth Move Of Doom

From the burning embers of his prenuptial agreement, white smoke rose from John Cena's mansion this week as he announced the imminent debut of a sixth move of doom. Cena must choose carefully, for whenever he has tried to add to his repertoire in recent years, it has almost invariably failed.

He tried to adopt a falling DDT in his otherwise really good mini-series with Cesaro. He let go of his head before it hit the mat. He looks like one of those old Hasbro figures with the legs stuck together when he delivers his dropkick. His manages the "release" element of the release Fisherman suplex, but tends to release his opponents onto their coccyx. His Frankensteiner was a disgrace to Scott. Remember the springboard Stunner? He shelved that when he realised that he has enough trouble travelling forwards.

There is a reason Jim Ross used to euphemistically refer to him as "just unorthodox". Cena, a great worker if not pure wrestler, is not meant to do sh*t he can't do. Look at his poor face seconds before he connects - or rather, barely connects - with his top rope flying leg drop. He looks terrified. He looks like he's about to open a paternity test.

Cena has tried and quietly dropped a sh*t-load of moves in the past. God knows what's in store for his opponent in China, but if he's genuinely relegating the AA to a signature - more so than he already has - here's hoping he doesn't get too ambitious.

Fingerpoke of Doom?