7 Ups & 2 Downs From AEW Dynamite (May 22 - Results & Review)
1. Pure Weapons-Grade WrestleCrap
After Malakai Black defeated Kyle O'Reilly, red spooky lights flickered over the arena.
Then, Malakai was drenched with a ludicrous amount of terrible fake blood. On about every conceivable level you could possibly imagine, this was awful.
Right.
To unpack.
The blood was obviously fake, but if the insinuation was that it was real, Adam Copeland has either killed a human being or a collection of small animals. At an absolute minimum, he has stolen it from a hospital and indirectly killed more people by preventing them from a potentially life-saving transfusion.
If the blood was meant to be fake, and this was some "twisted" "mind game", then Black was horrified to be...mildly inconvenienced enough to take a post-match shower, which you'd hope he would have done regardless. Also: this was obviously a nod to Adam Copeland's days in the Brood. What is remotely intimidating about that?
"Gaze upon the horror of...me cosplaying as my old greenhorn self being unable to cut promos in a gimmick that prevented me from getting over".
Also: who put the blood up there?
Also: it didn't look remotely real. There were bits in it, like jam (or "jelly").
Goofy, fake, cringe-worthy - and this isn't the first time that Copeland's self-referential work has scanned as masturbatory.