10 Upcoming Movies You Couldn’t Make Me Watch With A Gun To My Head

2. Transformers: The Last Knight

The Film

I can't be the only person in the world who sees the Transformers franchise in the harsh light of day, can I? Maybe I'm in the minority, but Bumblebee calling someone a "motherf*cker" last time out was the final straw.

Why Not Watch It?

Ever since the first atrocity against everyone's childhood, Michael Bay has systematically set about making sequels with the entertainment half-life of what came before. We've now got to the point where the giant swinging !*$% of a robo-monster and the racist Twins are probably viewed fondly as some of the high-points of the series.

And yet the franchise continues to bleed money out of its fans. Who are these people? If you take away the general appeal of the characters (the robots, not those lifeless excuses for human imposters they keep trying to save for some reason), you're left with vulgarity, slanty camera work and a general brainlessness that makes me ache inside the very core of my soul.

Luckily, the next one is about Optimus Prime being a Knight Templar, so there's no way that will be ridiculous... Oh no wait, that's not correct at all, is it?