The Theory: Given that Mila Kunis was unable to return to play Lori in Ted 2 and John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg) has a new love interest in Samantha Jackson (Amanda Seyfried), perhaps Seth MacFarlane goes the whole ridiculous hog and just kills her off altogether. Why It Could Be True: Everyone hates it when a crucial character doesn't return for a sequel, and in the case of Ted, it's extra-annoying given how the entire plot of the first movie revolved around John settling down with Lori and finding some balance in his life. If the two just got divorced a short time later, it completely undermines that message, so it would make sense for MacFarlane to embrace the awkwardness and have her die a comically ridiculous death that softens the blow a little. Why It's Probably Not: Frankly, who wants to think of the beautiful Kunis dying a horrific death? Nobody, that's who, probably not even the twisted MacFarlane.