11. Two Fistfuls Of Phallic - The Evil That Men Do
There was once a man who walked the Earth named Charles Bronson, and he rivalled Chuck Norris in sheer cheesy toughness. Typically cast as a tough-guy, by the 80s Bronson had been relegated to B-class action films, where he kind of became a parody of himself. Fortunately, this led to films like the gloriously boring 10 To Midnight, The sleep-inducing Death Wish V: The Faces of Death, and the violently amusing The Evil That Men Do. In the latter film, Charlie plays an former CIA assassin who is brought out of retirement by the death of a friend. Whatever the film lacks in originality it makes up for in the genital torture department. In the scene, Bronson is at a ramshackle bar in Guatemala, where a local heavy kisses on his girlfriend and insults American beer. Being a huge fan of domestics, Charlie grabs the goon out of his chair by his short and curlies and drops him to the floor. He then places a foot on the guy's neck and proceeds to lift him up by by his dill and kiwis... using both hands. The twisting and pulling occurs with such awesome disregard that most men will be on their knees by the time the guy in the scene passes out. All in the name of beer.