It's the day of your first tattoo; you're not hungover, you've eaten a full meal and had (maybe too much) coffee. You're ready to roll. There are so many tick boxes on this form. Yes you are sober. No you are not pregnant. No you do not have HIV. Oh my, look at all the side effects. Nausea, fainting, swelling, skin irritability: you could have sworn you were just getting a tattoo and not signing up for a life-threatening operation. Is this hospital or funtown? The tattoo artist sits you down, lays your arm out over a table, and asks you if you're ready. Yes, you say. I'm ready. Gulp.