10 Things John Cena STILL Can’t Actually Do

10. Comedy

Patter is in crisis.

Present WWE superstars are, in the main, the biggest bunch of losers ever to (dis)grace the wrestling ring. Few main roster performers are neither believably bad or honestly heroic, and the disinterest begins with woeful work on the microphone. Incongruous and inconsistent scripting has become the great albatross of our time - a vast majority of performers struggle to translate a writer's words in a way that benefits them, but the system is stuck rigidly in place to play to the strengths of the few that can.

John Cena is one of them. And John Cena (due to the aforementioned crisis) is still the biggest star WWE have.

Finn Bálor will thus be forced to crack jokes because John Cena does (badly). Roman Reigns will try and gain cheers fat-shaming Samoa Joe because Cena's carried on like (obnoxiously so) that since before the company went PG. Kevin Owens has his serious programmes destroyed because faces banter him off instead of fearing his fury - just like 'Big Match John'.

Steve Austin didn't get over pretending to be Hulk Hogan, just as Cena wasn't expected to ape 'The Rattlesnake' and The Rock. And yet, a generation of never-will-bes are now expected to vamp like 'The Champ'?