10 Sarcastic Movie Pricks You Can't Help But Love
6. Melvin Udall - As Good As It Gets
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
Dysfunctional, anti-semitic, homophobic isolationist and romance novelist- Melvin Udall (Jack Nicholson), suffers from OCD and a love affair with the lowest form of wit. The sheer offensiveness of Melvin's sarcasm makes for some great comedy moments in the film.
Melvin lives next to Simon, a tender, sensitive gay artist, whom Melvin reserves a particular dislike for. Simon gets a rough deal in the film, both from a burglary and a neighbour-from-hell. When Simon knocks on Melvins door we get Nicholson playing his frustrated, hilarious best. Here he is on the virtues of the lost art of door-knocking etiquette; "Never, never, interrupt me, okay? Not if there's a fire, not even if you hear the sound of a thud from my home and one week later there's a smell coming from there. Or, if it's election night, and you're excited and you wanna celebrate because some fudgepacker that you date has been elected the first queer president of the United States and he's going to have you down to Camp David, and you want someone to share the moment with. Even then, don't knock. Not on this door. Not for any reason. Do you get me, sweetheart?"
Even Simon's lover, Frank Sachs, played by Cuba Gooding Jnr and the one character brave enough to stand up to Udall, feels the brunt of Melvin's tongue- "Think white and get serious" Melvin tells the shocked Frank.
Eventually Melvin mellows as he falls in love with Carol the waitress. He introduces her to his hermitic life and, of course, to the lovable Simon...Carol the waitress; Simon the fag but it is over Veddell, Simon's dog where Melvin's character actually begins to soften.. Melvin Udall proves that sarcasm can be both funny and lovable.