We all know that feeling of grand disappointment when we sit down in the cinema for the latest entry in our favourite film series, and alas, it doesn’t just disappoint; it’s so insulting to our memory of the previous films, and manages to resonate in both critical reception and box office receipts, that the franchise you were looking forward to enjoying for the near future is at once killed dead in the water.
Of course, a studio’s desire to have sequel-after-sequel often invites a lack of creativity that means, inevitably, many series not blessed with a helmer like Christopher Nolan, for example, run their baby projects into the ground in the pursuit of money rather than artistic satisfaction. While the majority of entries in this list are governed more by a poor financial turnout than by a poor critical reception, there is a sure correlation between the two. While for the most part these films are bloated, unnecessary sequels, we’re going to start with two entries that never even got as far as moving into the franchise stage…
11. John Carter (2012)
Disney are a fine film studio for the most part, but more importantly, they are a collective of shrewd businessmen, and the success of their box office juggernaut Pirates of the Caribbean is a huge testament to this, given that a) it is based off of a theme park ride and b) each instalment has been more unbearably horrible, yet more successful, than the one before it. Of course, Johnny Depp’s half-arsed charm in those films isn’t going to last much longer, and realising this, Disney opted to queue up their next cash-cow, and after the Prince of Persia video game adaptation underwhelmed, they hoped that Edgar Rice Burroughs’ collection of Barsoom novels might serve as inspiration for another “quality” – or at least hugely profitable – franchise. And of course, why not release it in 3D?
But in the years to follow, a John Carter trilogy, and even a sequel, will be thought of as a long, distant pipe dream, because the film was released to ambivalence from film critics and absolutely failed to connect with audiences in the same way that similar films, like James Cameron’s Avatar, did. Against a $250m budget, the film grossed a shocking $282m, making it a full-tilt box office bomb, with Disney reporting that, marketing costs considered, the film would likely lose them $200m. Many have speculated on quite what cooked their goose, such as a poor marketing campaign, the incredulous casting of the relatively unknown Taylor Kitsch in the lead role without any sufficient supporting faces, or simply, the fact that the film was a boring, scarcely comprehensible mess that couldn’t even satisfy in a superficial way.
Of course, had things gone the other way, we’d be looking at a fast-tracked sequel that would probably be in the pre-production stages as we speak. Thankfully, in a rare case of people voting with their wallets, this piece of turgid Hollywood garbage is destined to be the punchline to many film-related jokes and little more.
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14 Comments
I like to think of Stuart Baird as the killer of Star Trek. I do disagree though that the series was killed stone dead, I don’t think they ever intended to do anything beyond Nemesis.
Apparently there were plans for one more TNG movie, which would have been their big send off, but that was dropped after Nemesis’s poor box office performance.
Peter Bonerz (directory of the final Police Academy film, was the dentist Jerry on the original Bob Newhart Show…
They should have made some straight to DVD TNG movies. Even if it didnt have the whole cast, I’m sure it would have sold and made a profit. The time’s past now for that to happen I feel. But Michael Dorn still seems keen.
No mention of Spider-Man 3 and X-men Last Stand?
I know that they were commercial successes, but Spider-Man 3 is part of the reason we have the reboot The Amazing Spider-Man.
X-men Last Stand while not awful, killed off 3 of the main characters (sorta Prof X). This lead to the bad Wolverine Origins, and the reboot of sorts X-men: First Class.
Was totally expecting “Alien: Resurrection” or “X-Men: The Last Stand” to be #1. And since the Wolverine: Origin movie was a huge piece of studio-interfered trash..thank goodness that the X-men universe is once again flying high w/ the involvement of Bryan Singer/Matt Vaughn in “1st Class”
Going with the theme of reboots here, I think Die Another Day deserves a mention. I mean seriously, the fact that the Bond producers felt rebooting the series after 4 decades should tell you something. Granted, James Bond is something that will always be around but still. It’s not everyday you reboot a 40 year old film series.
John Carter was fantastic. “Boring, scarcely comprehensible mess” is more the hack author describing this article.
John Carter was great.
I apologize for my behavior. I was just a little pissed off when I read that. I should never let something so insignificant, get me down so personally again.
I kind of disagree with you on Nemesis, kind of. I don’t think it’s that awful of a film for one. I can think of at least two films in the series that are worse. Obviously pointing this out doesn’t necessarily reflect good upon Nemesis. In any case the film has some solid concepts and ideas littered thought out. I didn’t find it at all as cold as many have mentioned. The marriage at the beginning, Data story arc while not perfectly played out are defiantly not unemotional or concrete cold.
The Battle near the end with space ships smashing into each other was impressive. The makeup was really good. This is not a brilliant film no way shape or form. It also has nothing to do with the Original Star Trek reboot. The reason those films ceased to be made is the original cast is too old. The only direction it could go in, in order to make new star treks movies from the original was a reboot.
As for Generations as a series it was always better suited to the TV and better then the movies it produced. First Contact I really do love but even that doesn’t compete with the best Original Star Trek films Wrath, Search and Undiscovered. Some truth is as you’ve pointed out competing with better films at the box office and having a bigger budget then it probably needed. Yet just as important coming off what I think is the worst Star Trek Generations movie or Star Trek movie in general didn’t help which was the crap heap of Insurrection. The audience had been fooled once they weren’t about to be fooled again. The Generations movies where nothing more than good TV movies with extended TV series ideas and story lines with the exception of First Contact and IMO Nemesis (to a lessor extent).
No Rocky V?
Supposedly the Blade series wasn’t canceled due to poor ratings; apparently Spike TV thought it was a “poor fit” for their channel due to over 50% of the show’s audiences was apparently women. Not something you really want when you’re trying to advertise yourself as a “man’s” channel.
Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life’s marketing was also terrible. The only advertising that I saw for it on TV was from some stupid camera commercial that featured an annoying voice, that played a ton of times. I don’t know if the studios thought they were killing two birds with one stone, but it killed my desire to see the film.