Be careful what you wish for. Audiences in 1971 were desperate for original 007 Sean Connery to return, after Aussie stand-in George Lazenby failed to wow them. Connery was then offered an unheard of fee and promised plenty of golf days to return for Diamonds Are Forever. Alas, the suave, animalistic Scot had seemed to have discovered cakes in his years off and was decidedly chubbier than before. Worse, fashion had discovered the turtleneck. Decked out in some of the worst styles of the day, Connery just about cuts it as Bond in the tux but elsewhere he looks exactly like what he is: a tall, slightly chunky, middle-aged guy in a wig. The worst of Connery's outfits include the cream trousers, white shirt and pink tie combo he wears when attempting to rescue Willard Whyte from bodyguards Bambi and Thumper (Bambi's outfit deserves a post all of its own). Bond should never wear pink - full stop - and if he does, it is a very bad idea to then go swimming and reveal your beer gut. However, this pales next to the quite extraordinary little number he sports when visiting Whyte's research centre. A garishly patterned brown sports coat would be bad enough but the beige turtleneck under it? The horror! Give Bond a pipe and he could easily wander into the human sciences faculty of any university.
Writer of The Blog of Delights, a review site covering film, TV, cult TV, books and audio. Fan of Dr Who, Bond, X-Men and Marvel. Also the writer of e-book 'Fictional Legends: Doctor Who - the TV Adventures' for Collca.
