Doctor Who: 10 Reasons Why The Rings Of Akhaten Sucks

Let's not take a leaf out of this book again.

It's been two years since audiences first sat back and watched the Eleventh Doctor and his relatively new companion, Clara, in Series 7's The Rings of Akhaten. The episode had a lot to accomplish: it had to further the ongoing plotline of the Doctor trying to work out who or what Clara was whilst simultaneously making the viewers like her. Oh, and the story had to include a truly alien environment because the programme was being accused of always being set on Earth.

It's a tall order and unsurprisingly the episode falls short of its goals, becoming one of the least liked stories since Fear Her. Admittedly, there is much to admire in The Rings of Akhaten and there are vocal fans who are blind to its many faults, but on balance it just isn't very good. The story received mixed reviews when it was first broadcast in April 2013 and repeat viewings haven't endeared it to many more fans since then.

Things start off well. Writer Neil Cross begins with a prologue showing the Doctor investigating Clara's parents and Clara as a young girl. At show runner Steven Moffat's request, Cross replaced the original opening - a run-of-the-mill conversation between Clara, the children she looks after, and the Doctor - with these scenes, and they work very well indeed. There's actually a sense of getting somewhere with the "impossible girl" storyline by digging into Clara's past.

It's only once the opening titles have faded away and the story proper starts that the rot sets in. Since the episode self-evidently does further the plot arc of the half-season, does present viewers with a generally sympathetic Clara, and does pull off a pretty good marketplace full of aliens, why does it fail overall? It seems to have achieved all of its goals, after all.

Ah, but therein lies the problem. None of those goals included having "a good, solid story full of excitement". The bare bones of the story should have been given much more thought, with entire elements ditched and vital sequences tweaked even more than they were.

In listing the 10 things that are worst about The Rings of Akhaten, emphasis was placed on items related to the story's ideas and to the realisation of the visual effects, both CGI and practical. As far as performances go, everyone involved on the acting side clearly tried their best with what they were given - it wasn't their fault!

However, let's take a moment for an "honourable mention" on the acting front: one of the few moments where a regular is less than stellar. Remember the scene in the marketplace when Clara is supposed to be sampling the blue, squishy fruit? Jenna-Louise Coleman blatantly doesn't take a bite out of the blue fruit thing. She just holds it to her lips. It's a couple of seconds that really don't work and they don't augur well for the rest of the adventure.

Keeping in mind that everyone involved was trying very hard to make a piece of outstanding television, let's take a long, hard look at what went wrong. And because these criticisms are made in a constructive, affectionate spirit, full of love for Doctor Who, each item will include a way where the unsuccessful element could have been avoided or done better. Obviously, anyone who has not yet seen The Rings of Akhaten should be aware there are spoilers ahead!

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Mike has lived in the UK, Japan and the USA. Currently, he is based in Iowa with his wife and 2 young children. After working for many years as a writer and editor for a large corporation, he is now a freelancer. He has been fortunate enough to contribute to many books on Doctor Who over the last 20 years and is now concentrating on original sci-fi & fantasy short stories, with recent sales including Flame Tree, Uffda, and The Martian Wave. Also, look for his contribution on Blake's 7 to "You and Who Else", a charity anthology to be released later this year. You can find him on Tumblr at https://www.tumblr.com/blog/culttvmike