Eurovision 2012: 5 Big Ballad Entries

Week 2: Eurovision usually prides itself on balls-out club bangers but things have changed in the wake of a world where every household owns a copy of Adele - 21. ESC 2012 features more balladeers than you can air-grab-during-a-key-change at but whether this is a good thing is highly debatable. Do we really want twelve identical piano-led torch songs about broken hearts? Can we survive a whole evening without a single firework display?

Here are five varying levels of balladry making up the highs and lows of what it means to send a slow song to Eurovision:

Rona Nishliu - Suus (Albania) Now the occasional tendency with ballads is if you have a good voice and get a bit too into the emotion of the song you d0 a spot of wailing similar to demon-possessed cats scratching blackboards (not that i've ever heard that thank goodness). Now Albania's entry by Rona Nishliu is one of those that fails to avoid this hazard despite having, arguably, one of the better voices in the contest. Suus starts so well with a lovely piano/strings combo and a sense of foreboding which fits Nishliu's singing but when the chorus eventually hits it's stops being a beautiful unravelling of emotions and just a all-out screech fest. The song's in Albanian and the word she's screaming is Qaj which means Cry but to my ears sounds like Chai so I can't get the image out of my head that she's wailing for a pot of tea. To be fair, the sections in the lower registers are lovely but it just becomes a bit too much LOUD SINGING by the end (avoid hearing it on full volume - you have been warned). Oh and the video is all kinds of arty weirdness involving the child from The Omen chalking the walls, Rona embedded in a black box and some strange masked ball-clinking. I massively hope she brings all of that to the Eurovision Stage because it would be a sight to behold... Odds of Winning: 150/1 - it'll depend what she sounds like on the night and being in the less ballad-heavy gives her a better chance but i'd be suprised if this qualifies. http://youtu.be/v9zIP4FA-1Y MayaSar - Korake Ti Znam (Bosnia & Herzegovina) I love a ballad when it throws in some other instruments to spice it up a little and the Bosnian entry has a secret weapon in their arsenal: a flute breakdown. No, not a dubstep kind of breakdown (although that would have been amazing - for ESC 2013 please!) but a lovely little middle 8 which floats along with the rest of this breezy but multi-layred ballad. MayaSar is a bit of Eurovision veteran at this stage despite this being her first time going solo: she's been a backing vocalist for two B&H entries not to mention playing the keyboard for last year's folk-tastic entry Dino Merlin - Love In Rewind (those cheeky Bosnian Gypsies, its one of the few songs I go back to from last year). Korake Ti Znam, which means I Know Your Steps (stalker), could have come from the closing credits from a Bosnia version of Disney's Pocahontas but equally fit for a piano concerto in the Royal Albert Hall and it is just lush. That is literally the only way to describe it - Lush. One minute there's a piano, then some strings swirl and tumble in like leaves in Autumn before the flute and Maya basically perform a little duet. Ok, the video is just bizarre and I'm hoping she doesn't bring the man with the donkeys with her but in a year full of balladry, it may have trouble standing out despite it's loveliness. Odds of Winning: 100/1 - I think, and hope, it'll do better than the odds suggest but it'll definately qualify for the final at any rate. http://youtu.be/v_fyisw2--M Pernilla Karlsson - Nar jag blundar (Finland)

A Eurovision ballad has something in its favour if it can summon up the country it's representing and, for me, Nar jag blundar does just that, even if it becomes a little monotonous by the end. Sung in Swedish (which is allowed, the Finnish people speak Swedish as well in Finnish), it has a very wintery feel as if stuck in some artic tundra surrounded by fairies despite also reminding me of that Leek Spin viral that went around years ago. Pernillla Karlsson is quite young but has a lovely voice which works well live, looks a little like Kate Nash's older bohemian sister (as opposed to ESC 2010 winner Lena who was the suprisingly less annoying little sister of Kate Nash) and comes complete with some cello action via the guy in the corner (watch the live performance below to see what I mean). I wonder if she'll take the leafy dancer lady too and give Loreen a run for her money in the 'Woop-woop-I-dance-all-kooky-me' stakes. The issue here is that of samey-ness which can often happen to ballads that get lost in an identity. On an album, that would be fine but for the Eurovision Song Contest there's an expectation of key changes, power and sheer volume which this song has none of. Whether that means it'll get lost in amongst all the other entries is unknown but Nar jag blundar is an extremly pretty entry.

Odds of Winning: 100/1 - stuck next to a similar ballad in Semi Final 1 but has a whimsy about it that may stand it good stead or alternatively end up leaving it forgotten and lonely. http://youtu.be/43GWoVxRk2Y Greta Salome & Jonsi - Never Forget (Iceland) You know I mentioned key changes, power and sheer volume a moment ago? Well look no further than perenially successful Iceland's entry which is about as overblown a ballad as you'll get this year. There's hearty pirate sea shanty strings, brooding Lord Of The Rings I'm-In-The-Mines-of-Mordor drums, choral chanting, menacing plinky keyboard, a undertone of electric guitar and those moments where everything stops for a moment and you go 'Oooo' before it smashes you in the face with a volley of male/female harmonising. Some people have argued that this was better when it was sung in Icelandic but frankly, to those un-adjusted to the tones of that language (basically everyone other than the 320,000 Icelanders), the English version actually makes sense and only adds to the massive scale of this song. It does mean we get lyrics of 'moonlit skies', 'at dawn they will be free' and 'endless night' which are more suited to a Twilight soundtrack but I don't really care when there's so much EMOTING going on here. Jonsi has performed for Iceland before back in 2004 where he came 19th (woop woop) but with Greta Salome he'll no doubt do better here with Never Forget (nice subliminal message there). They've got a look sorted judging by the video (blonde upon white upon white upon flowing fabric upon white with maybe a little black) and it's already got good feedback from fans, critics and the bookies so maybe this will be Iceland's year. Odds of Winning: 22/1 - fair odds for Iceland and they've done consistently well in recent years. The fact the song's in english will no doubt help it in the long run. http://youtu.be/p8RS0eulXDo Zeljko Joksimovic - Nije ljubav stvar (Serbia) If all else fails, just get a Eurovision veteran back in and throw a whole orchestra worth of music at him a la Serbia. Zeljko Joksimovic has already represented the country back in 2004 only losing to Ukraine's Ruslana and her half naked parade of cave women, that song then becoming a massive European hit as well as composing Bosnia & Herzegovina's highest ever placed entry (3rd) back in 2006 so he knows his way around a Eurovision song. Nije ljubav stvar is highly composition led, which isn't a suprise really, with at least three different sections including Imperial China stringed intro folowed by Going-Into-Battle-In-Imperial-China mid-song interlude and a drumming plus backing singer end section which reminds me of something off The Lion King. Not particularly european there then but extremely showy thats for sure. The one thing I don't get is in the live video below there features a full orchestra, backing singers, a rock band, a pianist and some long-haired dude with a snake charming flute thingy - you're only allowed about six people on stage by ESC law so how will Zeljko get around that? One solitary violinist doesn't look as impressive as 20 thats for sure and I can't imagine him rolling out the snake charmer dude in one of those one-man-band outfits during the interlude. All things aside, this is predicted to do big things in this year's contest but I can't help feeling that's on name alone and Iceland above have done this much better and way for accessibly for the audience. Odds of Winning: 14/1 - Up there amongst the favourites but I can't see it doing as well as everyone thinks. Could be in a similar situation to France's overhyped disappointment last year. http://youtu.be/75weifR47m0

Now for next week, what better way to go than way way way way down in terms of quality? That's right, we're tackling the truly WTF moments of this year's contest. Warning - things you may see include: a posse of disco grannies, a hideous pole-dancing fiasco, scary auto-tune a-go-go and a suspicious bearded character even Sacha Baron Cohen couldn't make up. See you next time!