10 Facts About Fighting That Action Movies Always Get Wrong

5. There's No Time For Witty One-Liners

Even the wittiest among us will have trouble getting the words "don't get murdered" out of our heads for a long enough period of time during a knock-down, drag-out fight to come up with something really clever and badass to say. Yet, everyone from Schwarzenegger and Stallone to Chuck Norris and Steven Seagal always seem to find ways to squeeze them in. "I'll kill your elbows, you f*cking sewer ass!" is about the best line I've ever personally heard during a heated battle of fisticuffs. Proof that, though some words might stop rattling around in your brain bucket long enough to form, they're unlikely to come out the way you intended them to. For many reasons. First of all, there's simply not enough time between shoving/grappling/haymaker-dodging to catch your breath and deliver a wry soliloquy. And secondly, adrenaline may bolster a lot of your physical attributes, but sadly, it does not turn you into a screenwriter for Die Hard. So unless you've spent some quality time rehearsing those zingers you jotted down in your notebook (while running through a haunted house), you should just leave the John McClane stuff to the professionals.