‘Writer’s Block’ – All Work and No Play Makes…

? The Frustrated Ramblings Of An Aspiring Filmmaker - Issue 2 Writers Block (think of it as a companion piece to Laurent's article in June about his screenwriting aspirations, which we hope to update you on soon) What is going on with British TV and the uhh ummm blah. With the end of the UK Film Council, the British film industry is uhh umm. I was watching uhhh. Writers block is a bitch! It can strike at any time and leave even the most prolific writer stumped. Not that Im prolific, but it still sucks. Just over two weeks ago I sat staring at my laptop screen for hours on end, despite the stack of ideas I had, my impending deadline and the list of things I wanted to do to my script. Ive been developing a TV serial for my Masters Degree in Screenwriting at Royal Holloway and Ive got a strong idea what my tutors like. I have a million ideas for story lines, know exactly what I want to do with it and know that I need to get a 60 minute episode written to a good standard by Oct 20th. But, still I couldnt seem to write. I sat staring at the screen feeling a little uninspired to write. I couldnt be arsed to tap the keys or think about my ideas in any more detail. I sat staring at the TV. So I went upstairs into my study. I flipped up my laptop screen and sat staring out of the window. I made some feeble excuse to myself about the room being too hot and came back down stairs. I then decided that sitting at the dining table with MTV on in the back ground would allow me write and not be distracted by the TV. I argued to myself that I could just listen to the music in the background. I sat staring at the TV. Why? I kept asking myself. I can write. I have a good idea. Ive been developing it for over a year. I have an outline already written! So why couldnt I write? Sometimes as a writer you can't. I can't. I need to be in a creative mood. Sometimes Im not feeling that creative and I procrastinate in excess. I walk the dog, bath, eat, do the dishes, my washing, pay my bills, go shopping, have a snooze, make that phone call, wade through my Sky Plus, go to the gym, watch a film. Anything to pass the time as I attempt to convince myself that once the task in question is completed I can go back to writing and the words will flow. But they dont. Sods law usually kicks in then and its when Im unable to write I feel the need and the creative juices flow in work, on the train, in the pub, at the cinema etc. I try to dedicate an entire day to working on my TV serial, but I get distracted. Or busy. Sometimes I gear myself up, convince myself Im ready, think long and hard about what I want to write. Then stare blankly at the screen. Writers block is nothing new. Apparently it affects most writers at one point or another. It can be brought on by stress, pressure, personal issues, relationship problems, living in the shadow of former success or having a generally pants idea in front of you. For me I think its just that Im a perfectionist. Unless Ive gotten my head completely around what it is Im tackling I dont feel comfortable writing it. I dont want to waste my time and energy writing something that isnt one hundred per cent all there in my head. I wait until its clear in my mind then hit the keyboard. I think. Maybe I should spend more time writing and then my ideas would be fresh in my head and ready to go instead of leaving my script for a month without looking at it. I could spend some time thinking about how I am going to tackle my problem. Is that more procrastination? Or, perhaps its my fear of failure? What if my big hope for success isnt good enough? What if my TV serial isnt as good as I thought it was? What if I write the entire 60 minute episode and it isnt working so I have to start again? Like Ive done once so far already! What if this is my one and only chance to make a name for myself? And I screw it up! Can I not write something else? But, its taken me 18 months to get this far through my current idea and its still no where near perfect! All I want to be is a writer. Id love to be a director, producer and many other things also, but I could live without them. What I really want to be is a writer. I cannot handle working 9 to 5 for the next 40 years. I would rather live in a hut on a Thai beach than live in a terraced house similar to the one I grew up in, drive a conventional family saloon and live an ordinary existence. I need more from life. I believe that becoming a writer can give me all that. Maybe the pressure is building in my sub conscious and Im afraid of my writing not meeting my immensely high expectations of myself? What if Im doomed to sell mobile phones for the rest of my life! Whatever the reason for my current writers block I will not let it defeat me! I cannot let it defeat me. I would rather fail miserably, than wish Id never tried. I can do this. I believe in myself. I am a writer. I can write. My idea is strong. Im on it like a fat kid on a cup cake! Today Ive walked the dog, bathed, eaten, watched TV, talked on the phone, paid my bills, done my washing and written an article for a website I write for. So tomorrow I have the entire day to work on my TV serial. Nothing can stop me. Im ready to write. I am. Really. Honestly. I hope. Please God, I need to get writing!