Going hand in hand with that over-attachment to fictional characters comes the way in which you can't help but have emotional reactions to their plights. Sadly, those emotional reactions have the pesky pattern of being somewhat exaggerated. When your favorite characters laugh, you laugh. When they wince, you wince. When something awful happens to them, you throw the book across the room or curse the author or bawl inconsolably until you're too dehydrated to continue. Knowing that a terrible fate is likely to befall your favorite characters does not necessarily soften the blow. Foreshadowing may be a familiar device to any bookworm, but even the most telegraphed of twists can be torturous. Just because you saw it coming doesn't mean that your beloved characters saw it coming, and their reactions can be downright agonizing to read.
1. Speaking Like A Character
This problem is one that most bookworms are hopefully able to conceal from outsiders to the literary world. It is a secret best spoken of in hushed tones among fellow readers. The general issues facing bookworms may be riddled with perfectly tolerable feelings of snobbery and dorkiness, but this one is just plain embarrassing. You begin to speak like a character. Your language becomes flowery after a venture with Tolkien. Your speech patterns become eerily reminiscent of Yoda after a binge on Shakespeare. That Transylvanian accent of yours totally sounds realistic after spending some time on Bram Stoker. You forget that some of those terms from George R.R. Martin aren't actually real. You've discovered that "Alohomora!" will not open doors, "Lumos!" will not turn on lights, and "Expelliarmus!" will not solve all of your problems. You use words with scores of syllables that would fit right in with 18th century literature but have no place in daily conversation. You adopt slang words that make no sense in your own culture or environment or...era. It's pretty bad. Or is it-like most of these 20 problems faced by bookworms-actually kind of awesome?
Fiction buff and writer. If it's on Netflix, it's probably in my queue. I've bought DVDs for the special features and usually claim that the book is better than the movie or show (and can provide examples). I've never met a TV show that I won't marathon. Follow on Twitter @lah9891 .
