8 Ways Climate Change Isn't Messing Around

9. "Global Warming"

Back in the day, everyone was going on about "global warming", so why are we all talking about "climate change" now? Is it different, have the scientists changed there minds? Does this mean that it's not actually getting warmer and the whole thing is just one big lie?

Nuh uh. Soz.

When we talk about global warming, we're generally referring to the observation that the overall temperature of the planet has increased by about 1.5% in the last hundred years. This is shortly after we discovered that burning an imperial sh*t-tonne of coal would really expedite the hitherto tedious process of empire building.

The thing is about "global warming" is that it doesn't quite take into account the myriad ways an increase in greenhouse gases could royally screw our planet. It's not uncommon to hear people come out with things like "huh, look at this rain, so much for global warming" and "I wish this global warming would hurry up, I'm freezing my nards off".

Yes, the overall climate of the planet is on the rise, but due to the way this would interrupt weather systems and ocean currents, localised temperatures may actually fall. A good example is the British Isles, which is actually on roughly the same latitude as Moscow, but has a decidedly warmer climate due to our friend the Gulf Stream. Take that away and it's gonna get pretty baltic up in here.

Away from climate, extreme weather conditions such as storms, floods, wildfires and droughts are likely to hit more frequently and more severely.

But hey, who doesn't like a good thunderstorm, eh? Well pretty much all of our food for a start.