9 Of Life's Most Important Questions Answered By Science

9. Toilet Seat Up Or Down?

This is an argument that has raged since the invention of indoor plumbing, but which side is right?

It all really boils down to who is more inconvenienced by each, and now researchers have boiled the whole debate down into a series of equations to try and solve this once and for all.

You're probably aware by now that both men and women need to sit on the lav at some point, but only men need to stand. You're also probably aware that people tend to urinate much more than they defecate (if this is not the case for you, please seek medical attention). These are the variables that need to be taken into consideration.

It turns out that the best strategy depends on the ratio of females to males. The paper describes it like this:

Overall, the general results clearly show that if the number of females is greater than or equal to the number of males the optimal placement of the toilet seat is down. Additionally, when males outnumber females, the optimal toilet seat placement is not always up: when there are four males in a household, the optimal toilet seat placement is only definitively up when there are two or fewer females; and when there are five males in a household, the optimal toilet seat placement is only definitively up when there are three or fewer females.

Clear as mud?

Although, convenience isn't the only consideration here. A bacteriologist would probably tell you that you should always put down the seat and the lid so as to prevent you from coating your toothbrush in aerosolized poo particles every time you flush. Yum.