It's not often Jose Mourinho says anything worth listening to but his ban on banter might actually have some merit. Due to Chelsea's dire start to their season, the manager is said to have prohibited his players from engaging in banter before games. While this might sound a) impossible to enforce and b) like another step down the path of Mourinho becoming a full-scale cartoon villain, it's hard to disagree with someone who's had their absolute fill of what these days passes for banter. People outside the UK might scratch their heads at this assertion. "But isn't banter just a couple of people having a light-hearted chat that might feature some well-meaning teasing?". Oh lucky, naive fictional foreigner, if only you knew the hell that British lads have wrought on the concept. Calling something banter is now just a means of getting away with being offensive under the guise of humour. Used a racial slur against a co-worker? Just a bit of banter, lighten up. Objectified your mate's sister, in front of them both? It's banter, learn to take a joke! Drunkenly pissed on your neighbour's car, the same neighbour who has 4 children and is working nights at the hospital after her husband Rob- good lad, Rob, always up for a bit of banter- left her without warning? Top bants that, everyone calm down.
Brydie is an Australian writer and performer living in London and she complains exactly the same amount about the weather as every other Australian living in London. Yes, that is her natural lip colour, no, she will not be taking any further questions at this time.
