Star Trek: 10 Terrible Ways To Time Travel

Okay, so when it comes to methods of time travel, this one did produce some particularly fun results, but, practically speaking, it was still a monumentally terrible way of doing it. As side-effects of Quark's scheming go, things could have also been worse: it's three Ferengi, kemocite* contraband (tall ships and tall tales), a stowaway, and a little bit of sabotage on a trip to Earth. Oh, and (our) Tom, be warned — there's Oo-mox in this one!

Rom's a genius now. Fair enough! Well, he's always been smart, just a little underconfident. They'd definitely all be dead without him. Quark has ever so generously offered up his new ship, bought for him by his nothing-but-trustworthy cousin Gaila, so they're taking Nog to Starfleet Academy "in style"… and leaving Morn in charge of the bar?! Good luck getting him to shut up and sell some drinks!

The terrible time travel comes in when the warp drive won't shut down and the ship is about to fly apart. No problem, though. All they need to do is vent plasma from the warp core into the kemocite to cause a cascade reaction, then modulate that reaction to create an inversion wave in the warp field which should push the ship back into normal space. Suffice it to say, the Ferengi trio — and a very persistent dog — find themselves in a post-war pickle (in Roswell) instead!

*Also spelt 'kemacite'.