Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2: 5 Ways to Cope with the End of Twilight

Twilight fan. However, after years of treating it like a punching bag, I realized something. It doesn't matter what I think about it, because it's not directed at me. Like Justin Bieber, Tyler Perry, and My Little Pony advertisements, I gradually came to the conclusion that these artists or programs or products aren't directed at me. I'm not their demographic, so they couldn't care less what I have to say about them. It's a conclusion that led me to stop knocking Justin Bieber's music. Because you know what? His music doesn't apply to me. He doesn't make his music apply to me and he's not asking me to buy tickets to his concerts. By making fun of him as an artist, I'd have to go out of my way to jeer him. And the same could be said of Twilight. That's why I've tried my hardest to stop making fun of Twilight for what it is. For its content, its messages, its characters...and I feel like a better, more sane person for it. But I am able to go into the films and pick them apart as movies, because dear Lord are they horrible. But I know there are tons and tons of people out there who are hardcore fans. So, the following article is to help them cope with the Twilight-y absence bound to come in the near future. Note, the satire. If you cannot, then this article may not be your cup of tea.

Contributor
Contributor

Cameron Carpenter is an aspiring screenwriter, current film and journalism student, and self-diagnosed cinephile, which only sounds bad in certain circles. Devoted fan of comics, movies, theater, Jesus Christ, Sidney Lumet, and Peter O'Toole, he sometimes spends too much time on his Scribd and comicbookmovie.com, but doesn't think you're one to judge, devoted reader. You can follow him on Twitter to watch him talk to people you didn't know exist. Oh, and Daredevil is quite the big deal around here (my head).