22 Problems Only People From The North East Will Understand

Drastically misrepresented by the tango-skinned cleavage-lovers of Geordie Shore, it's about time the people of the North-East got their due.

The North East of England. Home to the Geordies, the Mackems, the Pit-Yakkers, the Poolies and the Smoggies. About 3 million of us occupy this canny little place: filled with vast history, heritage, and - unfortunately - reality TV horrors. Our hometowns are portrayed to the watching world through the mining villages of Billy Elliott, Catherine Cookson prose, or the Fanta-faced sex beasts of Geordie Shore. It's a wonder the rest of Europe know there's any normal inhabitants in these once Viking-invaded lands. Still, some marvellous wonders have risen from this old chunk of Britain: Mr Bean is from Durham; Sting from Northumberland; Lucozade was originally made in a small chemist in Newcastle... and of course, there's GREGGS. It was Geordie music producer Chas Chandler who first discovered Jimi Hendrix and brought him to Newcastle and George Stephenson - the "Father of Railways" - who built the first inter-city railway line. Impressive, eh? We're all guilty of bad-naming our loveable Northern hometowns: the weather's rubbish, wages are shoddy, and some of the inhabitants are, well, interesting to say the least. But, we wouldn't change any of it for the world. Here's 22 reasons why living in the North East of England can be a problematic love/hate affair. Feel free to share your own North Eastern problems in the comments below.

22. Trying To Find A Card That Says "Mam" Not "Mum"

How many people do you know that use the term "Mum" in the North East? It's about as common as seeing a Geordie bloke wearing a coat mid-December. Why then, is finding a "Mam" card in the local Clintons or Card Factory like scrambling for a needle in a haystack? If you've ever handed over a MUM card at Christmas or birthdays, you'll know it just feels all kinds of wrong. Byker lass Joanne Burrows cottoned on to this problem, producing a unique range of Geordie Cards. There is, of course "I Luv Me Mam", and our personal favourites: "Eeeh Ya 18 Divint Gan Radge", "Ya Lush Ye", and "A Little Spuggie Telt Is It's Ya Birthday Pet". Brilliant.
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Human woman. Content Manager at What Culture. Lover of many "ologies", punk rock and cats. My god is Ilúvatar. Follow me on Twitter: @nina_cresswell