23 Problems Only Bar Staff Would Understand
Yay, it's Friday! Oh, wait...
Yay, it's Friday! Oh, wait... Anyone who works or has worked in a bar or pub will know the immeasurable willpower it takes to leave your wonderfully snug home on an evening; full of family, food and sweet, sweet television... and immerse yourself into the sticky, malignant world of drunks. A good bartender is a very important addition to the universe -we're more than just professional bottle lifters. We are givers of both verbal and liquid empathy and should be shown utmost respect, damn it. So what happens when, suddenly, you're sober, on the other side of the bar? Your perspective of drinking drastically shifts, that's what. You're suddenly fully aware of how alarmingly horrendous you look to a bartender, sprawled over the bar slurring like a battered-in Furby. You've started judging people by what they drink. Oh, and let's not even get started on students. By last orders on a student night, most bartenders are rocking silently in the dish wash, after an evening of thoughts that would make Michael Myers blush. It does have its benefits, though. On a weekend, you've started to believe you're twice as attractive than what you actually are, due to being hit on at work every night. Albeit, by intoxicated fools, but it still counts, right? You can spectate the most hilarious displays of the kind of 'human mating' that even David Attenborough would have trouble narrating, and get to watch liquored up louts make fools of themselves. It's all fun and games, 'til someone orders 18 Jägerbombs. Pint pullers of the world, unite. Do share your pub woes, bartender rage and club nightmares with the rest of us in the comments below.