Doctor Who: Cold War Review

rating: 3

This week's Doctor Who episode is supposed to be a cause for celebration, as it is Mark Gatiss' return to the Whovian universe. His past episodes have ranked pretty high (at least, they have in my book) as fan favorites, second only to some of Steven Moffat's finest hours. There's a reason these two work together often, and there's a reason these two run Sherlock together. Does this episode hold up to the Gatiss touch, or is it the exception to the rule? It's time to find out. The episode starts with nuclear missile drills at the North Pole. Tensions with the Soviets and NATO are high, and Captain Zhukov is making sure his men are ready. However, the drill is interrupted by Professor Grisenko, who stumbles onto the scene listening to his favorite music on his Walkman. (It is 1983, after all.) We learn that the Professor has recovered something during some Arctic oil drilling. Something frozen and mysterious. It only takes the actions of an eager crewman, who wants to thaw the object prematurely, to show us what we're dealing with: an Ice Warrior. Which is the perfect time for The Doctor and Clara to burst in. Both were expecting to have landed in Vegas, but have instead made it onto a rapidly descending submarine. They stop the sub from descending easily enough, but are still seen as a threat. Before they can even think of leaving, the TARDIS dematerializes without warning. No rhyme or reason behind this happening, tensions mount and Clara is knocked out for a little. As she comes to she sees an argument between The Captain and The Doctor about what's going on, what the Ice Warrior is there for, and if The Doctor can even be trusted. Soon enough, they learn that this Ice Warrior in particular is Grand Marshall Skaldak. One of the greatest Ice Warrior heroes ever, he sat in the ice for 5000 years. His reputation is infamous; infamous enough to worry The Doctor himself. No sooner is this revealed that one of the crewmen knocks him out and The Doctor wants him locked up. Which is a good time for The Doctor to have a nice little rundown of the history and physiology of the Ice Warriors for the sake of The Captain. Skaldak, on the other hand, takes this opportunity to summon his people via a radio signal emitted from his suit. The Doctor recognizes that the physical attack on the Ice Warrior means a declaration of war by Ice Warrior code. With the prospect of war between humans and Martians, Zhukov is even keeled about the situation. Lieutenant Stephashin, his right hand man, seems a little war hungry. Whatever the case, The Doctor and The Captain agree that neither of them can talk to Skaldak, because they're both fellow warriors. Skaldak will pick up on that and try to exploit their natures against negotiations. So naturally Clara is delegated for the task, what with being the plucky young companion and all. During her interrogation of Skaldak, he escapes his suit, free to roam about the ship. The Doctor has never seen this in an Ice Warrior before, and is obviously scared and excited at the same time. From the looks of it, he's more on the scared side. Skaldak eventually escapes his holding cell by sneaking past The Doctor and company. Also, for some reason the signal has stopped transmitting. The Doctor thinks Skaldak feels abandoned by his people, believing them to be long dead and unable to rescue him. He further theorizes that this will now cause him to exact revenge on the humans out of desperation. Which is exactly what Lieutenant Stephashin seems to suggest as Skaldak stalks and captures him. Stephanshin, more war hungry than his superior, suggests the notion of Mutually Assured Destruction. Something that while devastating, would give both warriors what they want: The Lieutenant would win the Cold War, and Skaldak would win the war against the humans. Skaldak informs the Lieutenant Meanwhile, the Captain is briefing his crew on their new mission. Fully trusting The Doctor, the Soviets are now tasked with saving the planet from the scourge of Mutually Assured Destruction. It is at this point that Clara learns one of the most important rules of companionship: if you fail, history changes from the script. Thankfully, the Professor finds The Doctor's Sonic, and gives it back to him; leading to the hysterical moment poking fun at The Doctor's habit of kissing everyone. Indeed, the Professor starts to show off more of his eccentric, yet caring side as he starts to sing "Hungry Like The Wolf". It seems as if he's trying to comfort Clara and offset her fears; but regardless she won't sing along with him. As crew members continue to die, Skaldak reveals that in an attempt to gain knowledge of human physiology, he's killing the crew aboard the ship. In fact, he almost kills Professor Grisenko as he attacks the creature while protecting Clara. The Professor seems to have taken a shining to her, and almost serves as a second Doctor who's watching over her. Skeldak's game plan is to start the Cold War. He's out for revenge, because his call hasn't been answered and he is despondent that after 5000 years he's the only Ice Warrior left. The Ice Warrior's suit reanimates itself, and is moving autonomously. The armor is being used to arm the warheads and begin the war. The Doctor tries to reason with Skeldak, but then resorts to threatening the ship. We finally see the Ice Warrior's face, and just when things look their worst, Clara steps in to rationalize with him. She noticed that he hesitated to kill the Professor when he had the chance, which leads her to try and appeal to his sentimental memories of his daughter. At the last possible second, The Ice Warriors rescue the sub in their bid to rescue Skeldak. However even after his rescue, the warheads are still armed and ready for launch. It takes Clara's singing to disarm the missiles, leaving victory in the hands of the Companion. She latches onto The Doctor for a huge hug, enjoying the adrenaline rush after she realizes that saving the world is "what do". As The Doctor locks onto the TARDIS, we find out why it dematerialized. Thanks to a threat avoidance system The Doctor tinkered with, the TARDIS left at the first sign of conflict. Its current location: The South Pole. After asking the Russian sub captain for a lift, The Doctor salutes the Ice Warrior ship as it leaves. This week's episode is the first weak link in this season's chain. While this episode was interesting, it only shows trace elements of the magic that Gatiss is capable of, which is rather disappointing. Also, the stakes never really seem high enough, and certain plot-lines (The Lieutenant and The Ice Warrior's partnership) are dropped and never resolved. The story could have been a great if they'd fleshed it out a little more, particularly since The Doctor and The Ice Warriors are the perfect allegory for the Soviets and the Americans. If you thought The Rings of Akhaten was a thin story, this is thinner and without any awesome action or emotional/dramatic beats to prop it up. However, it is always fun to see David Warner, and his underutilized role as Professor Grisenko is a nice break from his long standing career as a villain. This is where Gatiss shines, as his knack for character personalities shows in Warner's eccentric, Pop obsessed professor. Gatiss does well with period pieces, and this could have been another piece of evidence to that fact. Unfortunately, the episode doesn't hold up to his earlier episodes, and is the weakest out of series 7 yet. It doesn't hit the lows of episodes such as 42, Partners In Crime, or even Fear Her; but it's still a little off the mark. Lucky for those involved, even mediocre Doctor Who manages to be entertaining. As for Mr. Gatiss, he should consider this his freebee. Next Time: Paranormal activity in the 1950's, a spooky house, and a rather possessed forest. It's time to run. It's time to fear. It's time to Hide.