The Simpsons: All Of Bart's Love Interests, Ranked Worst To Best

In over 30 years The Simpsons has been on the air, Bart Simpson has had a fair few love interests. Sure, some have been unrequited love, and others he was just stringing along, but still; the boy gets around.

For this list, there’s been a few things taken into account to figure out exactly who’s hot and who’s not. How good a match they are for Bart and what their relationship brings out of him is hugely important, but seeing as it’s a comedy show they need to bring the laughs too.

As well as this, with so many characters in Springfield over the years, the more original and imaginative do better, while those who are rushed in or out of the story for plot fare worse. As you might expect, earlier characters from when the pacing was much tighter tend to feature later on.

Finally, characters used for spot gags like Sarah, Tall & Plain or the vaguely Spanish girl Bart kisses over summer have been left out as there’s not really much to say. Likewise, Treehouse Of Horror style episodes like when Bart marries Kang & Kodos’ offspring in an Avatar parody isn’t canon, so no dice.

Annika Van Houten is voiced by Carice Van Houten, best known for her portrayal of Melisandre in Game Of Thrones. Though there’s been some good guest Van Houtens over the years, the only thought process for getting Carice in seems to be that both she and Milhouse share the name Van Houten.

There’s just not enough about her. Nothing stands out as wrong with Carice Van Houten’s performance, it just all feels tacked on. In many ways, Annika is a perfect example of modern day flaws the show has.

A name brand actor brought in for marketablity, uninspired characterisation that falls way short of the likes of Lyle Langley or Frank Grimes, and ditching the timeless quality in a bid to stay relevant with her plot tying into e-cigarettes and vaping.

They play with the idea of her as a love interest for Bart, but then back down and don’t commit. Realistically she could’ve been left off the list without anyone batting an eye, but a guest spot this superfluous deserves to be dissected. She’s not the worst one off by a long shot, especially when you consider the single-scene celebrities playing themselves. She’s easily Bart’s worst love interest, though.