5 Most Insane Things Happening In Wrestling Right Now (March 2)
3. John Cena SOMETHING SOMETHING
This John Cena business is an asylum of insanity, chiefly because the notion of John Cena not going to WrestleMania is as absurd as his selling in the first five minutes of every match he's ever wrestled.
Cena failed to win the Royal Rumble, and failed to point at the WrestleMania sign at Elimination Chamber on Sunday. On Monday's RAW, he cut a forlorn figure. He teased calling out the Undertaker, before remembering that he is so indispensable to the company that he is the only free agent allowed to saunter between brands blue and red as he pleases. But not indispensable enough to go to WrestleMania. Somehow.
So he decided instead to go to SmackDown to beg Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan for a crack at the WWE Championship instead. And he received one: by virtue of cleanly defeating AJ Styles - what confidence crisis? - Cena enters what is now a Fatal 6-Way, or 6-Pack Challenge, or a There Are Now 5 People Who Definitely Are Not Winning Match.
If rumours are to be believed, Cena is in line to wrestle a mysterio opponent in New Orleans in...Rey Mysterio. This rumour, offered by Sports Illustrated's Justin Barrasso, is odd, not least because it rules out the heavily-rumoured Undertaker match, teased just this week on RAW. Has 'Taker finally put down the Stetson for good?
Or does nobody have a clue what's going on because mole man Jimmy Jacobs is no longer around?