10 Annoying Types of People in the Movie Theater

9. The Texter

Apparently someone didn't get the memo that the screen they should be looking at isn't in their hands. Luckily, some ingenious minds made the screen in question both enormous and in the direction of the seats. Yet, there are still those who persist in ignoring the movie playing in front of them that they paid money for to continue or start a conversation with someone not in the theater. You want me to level with you? Alright. I'll level with you. Yes, I have friends. And sometimes, I have the perception that these friends adore me so much that they have to know what I'm doing at all times. These friends can't get enough of me, so for their sake, I'll text in the movie theater. I get it. You're popular. I'm popular. It's really a gift and a curse, isn't it? But let's get one thing straight. You didn't just pay for a ticket. You paid for the movie theater experience. You paid for the immediacy of the film in your local establishment. You didn't pay for the movie all to yourself, despite how much you might feel entitled to do whatever the hell you want in the theater. You paid for a fraction of, not even the movie, but of that showing. You paid for the atmosphere. The sticky floors, the bad carpet, the chairs that may have been cleaned a total of two times in the past twenty years...you're purchasing that with your ticket. And maybe you think it sucks. And that does sound like it would suck. But when you start texting, you're adding to that atmosphere. You're bringing something new into the theater and creating a distraction. You're abusing everyone else's fraction of the showing. You may not think you're being selfish, but you truly are. Just enjoy the movie. If you're bored by it, just leave. That's the movie's failure if you're making your best attempts to pay attention. But it's also the risk you took in your purchase. And now that that rant is over, I'll go talk to my therapist.
Posted On: 

Cameron Carpenter is an aspiring screenwriter, current film and journalism student, and self-diagnosed cinephile, which only sounds bad in certain circles. Devoted fan of comics, movies, theater, Jesus Christ, Sidney Lumet, and Peter O'Toole, he sometimes spends too much time on his Scribd and comicbookmovie.com, but doesn't think you're one to judge, devoted reader. You can follow him on Twitter to watch him talk to people you didn't know exist. Oh, and Daredevil is quite the big deal around here (my head).